List of Cool What-If Scenarios for Aguman
I’ve always noticed that my most creative window during the entire day is during the wee hours, as I lay down on my bed, trying to sleep (well, supposedly ‘trying to sleep, because 
most normally, I am not, hehe!). It sucks really, because instead of sojourning to Dreamland, I end up jotting down my ideas and being so excited that I cannot sleep anymore.
Anyway, one time, I channelled such late night (or early morning) creative energy towards writing my next column. Here are the figments of my crazy imagination – a list of cool what-if scenarios for our beloved org.
WHAT IF UP AGUMAN HAS ITS OWN ORG HOUSE?
Just the other week, Kenn gave me a copy of an episode of a US TV Series entitled Greek. It’s about the academic and social lives of a group college students who are zealous members of fraternities and sororities. They live in these fully-furnished frat and soro houses that serve as their dormitories. So it got me thinking, wouldn’t it be wonderful if all AguPips are housed in one single mansion? Oh our acads be damned, haha!
Picture this: A two-storey modern mansion that is shaped like a star from top view just like the Paskuhan Village, to honor the world-famous Kapampangan craftsmanship of lantern-making. All in all, we would have 22 bed rooms that will be named after the 20 towns and 2 cities of Pampanga and can house 3-10 people, depending on the area and population of each town or city. We’ll have the usual house amenities: comfy bathrooms, stylish kitchen, dining area, entertainment area and a function hall where we can hold our different activities. Of course, the AguMansion will be a wifi hotspot. The catch is that we would all have to take turns in doing the chores because we won’t have house help. Such services is a tad too much, don't you think so? (Yeah, right, as if having an AguMansion in the first place isn’t!).
Being the oldest, I will be the unofficial and self-assigned ‘mansion manager’ so my 34G experience will come in handy, haha! I will print and cut out pictures of all the members and put them in little slots in a board that will remind them of their house tasks. I will already assume that no matter how many reminders the whole household gets from me, a few will still not wash their own dishes, glasses and utensils so Felipe would end up washing them himself. And then when it is Nic’s turn to clean the kitchen sink, I will tell her to boil water first, pour it into the metal sink and spray some Domex to kill the germs and mildew.
It would always be a busy household – Marco’s watching a movie; Joms is chatting with his Econ friends (with matching controversial status messages); Bong, Kevin, Aries and Trish are gobbling some whole roasted chicken (each); Josef, RJ, Aga and Andrew are playing some network games; Justin and Dondon are editing and making some videos; Yek, Ruth, Elai, Loree and Anj are giggling at the latest episode of Gossip Girl; Felipe and Fergie are enjoying their favourite frappes at the terrace café and of course – Mike is sound asleep upstairs.
WHAT IF WE HAD A VP FOR ROMANTIC AFFAIRS?
Remember how some alleged ‘chevering’ of the applicants caused a little stir among us members just recently? We went on and on about defending our actions, explaining our alibis and airing out our jealous concerns about the possible consequences but the truth be told – it’s not exactly illegal for two AguPips to “chever”. It is not a violation of our constitution and by-laws. So what if an elected officer can actually mediate when it comes to instances and matters like this? Ha! Then falling in love in Aguman won’t have to be that hard. And complicated. And secretive. haha!
Picture this: An officer who is responsible for the enhancement of the romantic affairs, love lives and dating of the members. This way, an AguBoy will know what to do if and when he falls in love with an AguGirl (or any other girl for that matter). He will be advised on every step of the way – from the testing the waters, casual flirting, initial dating, etc – to make sure that each celebrated love team in the org will not end up just being a love team, that they will actually end up happily together! And that’s just the easy part. The hard part is when an AguPip gets a broken heart.
Such position is called for to ensure the overall emotional well-being of the members so that they may perform to the best of their abilities when it comes to their acads and of course, various orgwork.
The part I haven’t figured out is what if the VP for Romantic Affairs needs help himself/herself? Hmmm... interesting.
WHAT IF SOLICITING FUNDS OR SPONSORSHIPS ISN’T THIS HARD?
Funding is a perennial problem when it comes to a non-stock, not-for-profit organization like ours. In my long stay in Aguman, it’s the same old story for each project head and treasurer, year after year – “Mag-solicit tana guys, oh. Ala tanang pera talaga.” We’re just students embarking on worthwhile and service-oriented projects that supposed to be the job of existing local government agencies, can’t we at least get or receive all the funding we need to truly achieve our goals of serving the best interest of our people? What if all we have to think about is carrying out the plans and doing the legwork while the source of money for the expenses won’t be a concern anymore?
Picture this: Each Aguman activity is co-presented by numerous companies and institutions. They’re so many that their logos are worth two rows in the event posters and teasers. And that’s just major sponsors. The minor sponsors form 3 rows of text at the bottom part, haha! The generous sponsors and benefactors are so many that it takes 3-5 minutes for the host or quizmaster to deliver one round of acknowledgment.
Then all our registration fees are waived (even on the CEER). We get to give away lots of freebies to the participants and luxurious medals and trophies plus scholarships to the winners. We even get to give away food chits! Oha, bonggang-bongga ne? haha!
WHAT IF BEING AN AGUPIP IS SOOO COOL THAT TO JUST ATTEND THE ORIENTATION IS A MAJOR ACHIEVEMENT ALREADY?
Now that would definitely mean that we’ve made it as an organization, right? Time and time again, at least one applicant defers from application process for a number of personal reasons. No matter these reasons are, I’ve always personally believed that at the core of these reasons, whether valid or not, there was just not enough reason to stay. Well, it’s their loss, right? Hehe! But what if the org is such in demand that we actually go through an audition process in our application process to keep it manageable?
Picture this: A select panel of judges that includes the MemComm Head screens applicants before they actually are invited to the orientation. Each person would have to “sell themselves” before the panel (who knows, maybe by comparing themselves with a cool and useful bag or something). Then the judges will decide with a ‘yes’ or a ‘no’ ala Idol! The grading system would have to be retooled in a big way to suit the needs of the situation. After each activity, each applicant must gather enough votes to proceed in the app process. Take note, we don’t necessarily “eliminate” the app with the least number of votes. For as long as they maintain the required number of votes, they will go on to become the Aguman Idol! Este, Aguman member pala, haha!
__________
Obviously, impossible is the name of the game. From what I listed above, only one is even remotely possible or feasible (although the details are still very much a shot through the moon, haha!). One does not even make sense and is clearly just a symptom of reality TV contest addiction. But hey, libre lang mangarap, don’t they say? So I dreamt, hoped and imagined, not for myself alone.
But, having imagined all these, I think that even without these outrageously nifty scenarios, Aguman would still be the ‘coolest’ Kapampangan organization from the flagship campus of the University of the Philippines. Considering what we’ve achieved for the past three decades on such limited resources truly proves that we’ve stayed true to our noble cause.
WHAT IF UP AGUMAN HAS ITS OWN ORG HOUSE?
Just the other week, Kenn gave me a copy of an episode of a US TV Series entitled Greek. It’s about the academic and social lives of a group college students who are zealous members of fraternities and sororities. They live in these fully-furnished frat and soro houses that serve as their dormitories. So it got me thinking, wouldn’t it be wonderful if all AguPips are housed in one single mansion? Oh our acads be damned, haha!Picture this: A two-storey modern mansion that is shaped like a star from top view just like the Paskuhan Village, to honor the world-famous Kapampangan craftsmanship of lantern-making. All in all, we would have 22 bed rooms that will be named after the 20 towns and 2 cities of Pampanga and can house 3-10 people, depending on the area and population of each town or city. We’ll have the usual house amenities: comfy bathrooms, stylish kitchen, dining area, entertainment area and a function hall where we can hold our different activities. Of course, the AguMansion will be a wifi hotspot. The catch is that we would all have to take turns in doing the chores because we won’t have house help. Such services is a tad too much, don't you think so? (Yeah, right, as if having an AguMansion in the first place isn’t!).
Being the oldest, I will be the unofficial and self-assigned ‘mansion manager’ so my 34G experience will come in handy, haha! I will print and cut out pictures of all the members and put them in little slots in a board that will remind them of their house tasks. I will already assume that no matter how many reminders the whole household gets from me, a few will still not wash their own dishes, glasses and utensils so Felipe would end up washing them himself. And then when it is Nic’s turn to clean the kitchen sink, I will tell her to boil water first, pour it into the metal sink and spray some Domex to kill the germs and mildew.
It would always be a busy household – Marco’s watching a movie; Joms is chatting with his Econ friends (with matching controversial status messages); Bong, Kevin, Aries and Trish are gobbling some whole roasted chicken (each); Josef, RJ, Aga and Andrew are playing some network games; Justin and Dondon are editing and making some videos; Yek, Ruth, Elai, Loree and Anj are giggling at the latest episode of Gossip Girl; Felipe and Fergie are enjoying their favourite frappes at the terrace café and of course – Mike is sound asleep upstairs.
WHAT IF WE HAD A VP FOR ROMANTIC AFFAIRS?
Remember how some alleged ‘chevering’ of the applicants caused a little stir among us members just recently? We went on and on about defending our actions, explaining our alibis and airing out our jealous concerns about the possible consequences but the truth be told – it’s not exactly illegal for two AguPips to “chever”. It is not a violation of our constitution and by-laws. So what if an elected officer can actually mediate when it comes to instances and matters like this? Ha! Then falling in love in Aguman won’t have to be that hard. And complicated. And secretive. haha!Picture this: An officer who is responsible for the enhancement of the romantic affairs, love lives and dating of the members. This way, an AguBoy will know what to do if and when he falls in love with an AguGirl (or any other girl for that matter). He will be advised on every step of the way – from the testing the waters, casual flirting, initial dating, etc – to make sure that each celebrated love team in the org will not end up just being a love team, that they will actually end up happily together! And that’s just the easy part. The hard part is when an AguPip gets a broken heart.
Such position is called for to ensure the overall emotional well-being of the members so that they may perform to the best of their abilities when it comes to their acads and of course, various orgwork.
The part I haven’t figured out is what if the VP for Romantic Affairs needs help himself/herself? Hmmm... interesting.
WHAT IF SOLICITING FUNDS OR SPONSORSHIPS ISN’T THIS HARD?
Funding is a perennial problem when it comes to a non-stock, not-for-profit organization like ours. In my long stay in Aguman, it’s the same old story for each project head and treasurer, year after year – “Mag-solicit tana guys, oh. Ala tanang pera talaga.” We’re just students embarking on worthwhile and service-oriented projects that supposed to be the job of existing local government agencies, can’t we at least get or receive all the funding we need to truly achieve our goals of serving the best interest of our people? What if all we have to think about is carrying out the plans and doing the legwork while the source of money for the expenses won’t be a concern anymore?Picture this: Each Aguman activity is co-presented by numerous companies and institutions. They’re so many that their logos are worth two rows in the event posters and teasers. And that’s just major sponsors. The minor sponsors form 3 rows of text at the bottom part, haha! The generous sponsors and benefactors are so many that it takes 3-5 minutes for the host or quizmaster to deliver one round of acknowledgment.
Then all our registration fees are waived (even on the CEER). We get to give away lots of freebies to the participants and luxurious medals and trophies plus scholarships to the winners. We even get to give away food chits! Oha, bonggang-bongga ne? haha!
WHAT IF BEING AN AGUPIP IS SOOO COOL THAT TO JUST ATTEND THE ORIENTATION IS A MAJOR ACHIEVEMENT ALREADY?
Now that would definitely mean that we’ve made it as an organization, right? Time and time again, at least one applicant defers from application process for a number of personal reasons. No matter these reasons are, I’ve always personally believed that at the core of these reasons, whether valid or not, there was just not enough reason to stay. Well, it’s their loss, right? Hehe! But what if the org is such in demand that we actually go through an audition process in our application process to keep it manageable?Picture this: A select panel of judges that includes the MemComm Head screens applicants before they actually are invited to the orientation. Each person would have to “sell themselves” before the panel (who knows, maybe by comparing themselves with a cool and useful bag or something). Then the judges will decide with a ‘yes’ or a ‘no’ ala Idol! The grading system would have to be retooled in a big way to suit the needs of the situation. After each activity, each applicant must gather enough votes to proceed in the app process. Take note, we don’t necessarily “eliminate” the app with the least number of votes. For as long as they maintain the required number of votes, they will go on to become the Aguman Idol! Este, Aguman member pala, haha!
__________
Obviously, impossible is the name of the game. From what I listed above, only one is even remotely possible or feasible (although the details are still very much a shot through the moon, haha!). One does not even make sense and is clearly just a symptom of reality TV contest addiction. But hey, libre lang mangarap, don’t they say? So I dreamt, hoped and imagined, not for myself alone.
But, having imagined all these, I think that even without these outrageously nifty scenarios, Aguman would still be the ‘coolest’ Kapampangan organization from the flagship campus of the University of the Philippines. Considering what we’ve achieved for the past three decades on such limited resources truly proves that we’ve stayed true to our noble cause.
